March 2021


I was told I didn't have to come into work today, which is nice because it's nice out, but not so nice to lose a days worth of pay. The more I look at my site and the things I am doing with my life i'm not sure how to feel. I don't exactly think im moving forward in my life even though I ran 9 miles today.. I just want to be genuinely happy with myself. I think being genuinely happy is a good goal but that doesn't exactly pay the bills or get me out of the house I currently reside in *sigh. I'll probably continue ranting on and add more to this later or update all the lame poetry i've written in my notebook for the last month. I really like taking photos of nature but it's so annoying to honestly send it off my phone, crop it to the size I want, and then upload it on here. But that's just me being lazy I guess. Other thoughts i'm considering is going back on social media again as a whole general platform after my settlement court case coming up. It's hard looking at all my old photos of who I use to be compared to who I am now. I feel like I use to be so bold, so new and fruitful. Now I just feel like a bag of chips that's been opened and kinda stale if you feel me. Spring is officially here.. they are ants coming through the window ledges again.


well its been a minute, my friends.

January 2021


still trying to find myself.


i don't know what to do.


welp. the new year doesn't feel that new at all. as much as i try to contain and or change things i'm still always stuck in the same boat. i think i was born unlucky.